Dents and Scratches
It’s been a day since I heard you laugh
And it is already January inside of me
I am frozen, unmoving.
It is March inside of me
I grow on colours
The pinks of tulips and yellows of sunflowers
I am confounded as the seasons
Seeking solace in neither Winter nor Summer.
It’s been months since I heard your laugh
And I have burrowed it
Deep in the pockets of my mind
Where I cannot find it.
For it may fall out,
Seep through my slippery fingers.
Right now, it still lingers
My heart floats at the thought of your name
But I dare not say it anymore.
It is July inside of me
Each day is dreary
Every emotion, a drudge.
Thoughts of you induce an incessantly pouring rain
That falls on my heart
Your smile is fading
Slipping away like the rainwater in my hands
And I’m begging
Begging my heart
It is October inside of me
I forget your ringing laugh
And your ruby lips
My hungry heart searches my mind
for glimpses of you to devour
It is sultry and oppressive.
I remember you caressing my face
Beautiful things have dents and scratches too
You were perfect.
One rotten apple spoils the other
Now, I am. And you are not,
And your memories have drowned themselves
in my dents and scratches.
I tried to stop them
But they seeped like rainwater in dry mud.
So, come back,
Before I do something terrifying
Like saying your name
For it has been far too long,
And it will be
Cacophonic as a gong in the silence
Ethereal as a lone star in the sky
But those scratches darling,
Those scratches and dents.
Did I scar myself?
Did I turn my body into a grave
For your memories?
Or did you?
Guess it’s too late to know.